Today at 6:00 I was supposed to board a Megabus and head to my mistress city, that bustling, insomnia-fueled, show-tune-filled place. The Big Apple. The city that never sleeps. NYC.
I could fill the internet with paragraphs dedicated to my love of that town. This weekend I was supposed to be there catching the Q train, visiting MoMA, and eating the good bagels. All while accompanied by my sister from another mister.
Let’s not mentioned what happened. We all know why I’m not going. There’s no need to dwell on what might have been and why it’s not.
I also don’t want to focus on the very real tragedy of what is happening there now. Turn on the news, hop on social media, scan the headlines. There is nothing I can write that will be able to describe what is happening or report anything uplifting that will make a difference in the least.
So I’m going to do the only thing I can: I’m going to keep my weekend getaway with NYC, just at a responsible 191.6-mile distance.
If you’d like to join me, here’s my plan.
April 17, 6:00 – Board my “bus”
I’m going to take my usual reserved seat that I paid an extra dollar for and pray that no one crowds me on this Megacouch ride. But no doubt, I’ll be smushed in the row with three other travelers. (One will probably try and sit in my lap. Sookie is such a bitch.)
I’ll pass the time by watching a downloaded episode of Sex and the City, I’m thinking I Heart NY. It’s one of my favorite episodes and has a real NYC feel. Plus, there are cute sailors, which I never mind seeing on screen or off. When that’s over, I’ll catch up on my favorite podcast The Bradshaw Boys. I hear they will be releasing an episode where they interview Kristin Davis.
10:00pm – “Arrive“ and head to a drag show
For what will most assuredly be the only time in history, I will make it to NYC in record time. This is great because I have a free ticket to Hot Mess: Digital Drag Show at House of Yes. Do you need a ticket? No, just follow them on Instagram and join in the live showing.
Midnight – Sleep
Sure, it’s the city that never sleeps, but I’ve got big plans for tomorrow and I worked all day, plus there was the long couch commute. So unless I hit if off with someone online and they want to take this back to their screen, I’m calling it a night.
April 18, 9:00 am – Hit the gym, chat with Christina, get some good “bagels”
I’ll have been up early scrolling through my social media, I always am. Christina and I will chat on the phone for who knows how long. She will convince me to have joined her in an at-home workout. I will struggle through this.
As a reward I will want to have a good bagel, which I brought back with me last time I visited in December and froze. However, I have already eaten them all. (Note to self: when I go back, buy a suitcase full of good bagels and freeze for coming doomsdays. May need to buy another freezer to hold them all.) Luckily for me, I have the next best thing, which is good English muffins made by Motzi Bread. It just so happens that my bimonthly pickup is today, so I’ll grab my bread (socially safe). Plus, I threw in an order of their blackberry peach jam, so call this Bmore’s bagel and smear.
2:00 pm – Visit MoMa. Or The Met. Or The Whitney. Or all of them.
I have never been to The Museum of Modern Art and was really looking forward to finally going this weekend. Fortunately, I still can by clicking any of the links at Curbed New York. Everything you need to know about visiting the best of NYC sights is right there. So after I’m finished with MoMA, I can bounce on over to another museum, hit a library or “stroll” through a park.
6:00 pm – Have my dinner of chicken and “waffles”
There is an amazing diner I go to every single time I am in NYC for the greatest chicken and waffles I have ever had in my entire life. (Which at this point is 38 years long.) Alas, I can’t go this time, or even have it delivered. So I’m making myself some chicken and pancakes. Why pancakes? Because I don’t have a waffle maker. But I do have this super easy, never fail, tastiest best ever pancakes recipe from Grace and Good Eats. I found this recipe years ago when scrolling through Pinterest. Trust me, you make these and you’re never going to make any other pancakes.
As for the chicken? Maybe I’ll make my version, which is not that great. Maybe I’ll get RoFo.
8:00 pm – Cyber Saturday: HOY digital dance party
I’m heading back to the House of Yes tonight, but this time I am to be seen instead of just watching. Each Saturday they’ve been hosting Zoom dance parties. Since I’ve never been to a Zoom dance party and I’m free, I figured why not join in this. You can grab your free ticket to attend as well. Just remember to come dressed up, turn on your party lights, and bring your best moves. Then it’s just dance the night away.
April 19, Noon – Get some fresh air
You better believe I’m sleeping in after an all-night dance fest! I’m planning on taking it easy in the morning and having a late brunch. (Probably good English muffins. Maybe chicken and pancakes. Maybe ice cream. Who knows?)
Since my weekend “away” is coming to an end, I have to hit my favorite place in the world:
This park is the reason I love New York. Yes, we have parks here. Yes, they are closer. But I adore this park. So I’m getting in my comfy virtual hiking clothes, filling up my reusable water bottle and taking advantage of the virtual tour they have. Plus, it’s narrated! (Okay, I peeked, why not?)
4:00 pm – “Head home”
Or not. Who knows? Since the commute is going to be really easy, I may stay a little longer. Perhaps I’ll take in another museum or read Vogue in Battery Park. Oh! Maybe I’ll rewalk the Brooklyn Bridge! There are a lot of good point-of-view videos on YouTube. I mean it’s NEW YORK CITY! The ideas are endless!
If you think I am bluffing and not going to do this virtual weekend in NYC, then you have a lot to learn about me. I’ll be sharing my get-in-away on my Instagram stories all weekend. First big event will be an 8:00 showing of that Sex and the City episode.
What could just B more NYC?
The article A Virtual Weekend in NYC was written by Elizabeth Schap and first appeared on just B more.
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